My Summer Hermitage

I admit it. I am indeed, a summer hermit. It seems like every year I get all these big plans for what I'm going to do with my summer vacation, and then I get home and I realize that I don't like people. It's true. I really don't. If I have to make a choice between going out and staying in I choose staying in, ALONE, every time. It's just the way I am. I get caught up in writing, and books, and forgetting to eat because I'm working on this or that project, and I forget that all the people I used to talk to exist or even know that I'm still alive anymore. I'm not saying I don't like some human contact, becuase occasionally, yes, I do need entertainment, but other than that, I really don't see the point. Give me a cabin in the woods, an internet connection, and maybe a bag of Frito's, and I'm just swell. I'm just that much of a not-a-people-person. I don't even like calling people. It's time consuming, you get very little out of it , and you often find yourself consoling your friend that no, she is not fat, her boyfriend's just a douschebag. So here's to me, sitting here, still in my pajama's, and eating a bag of Frito's. I'd say something super lame, like "Summer Hermits, Unite!", but we probably wouldn't want to talk to each anyways, let alone meet. That's just the way we hermits are.

Soccer vs. America: Who Wins?

Ahh, the war that is soccer, (or, football, as it is called in every nation BUT the one that hates it). It seems that every four years, with the arrival of FIFA comes the same old argument. Is soccer REALLY an American sport? Is it even a sport at all? The answer seems clear-It's the second most played high school sport in America, and crowds at the national team's recent final home game reached 50,000. And yet, it's still too simple, many critics claim. Who wants to watch a game in which the score rarely goes over 1, and the players biggest "challenge" is to run around and sweat profusely? I don't know about you, but I think it may be the same people who are impressed that soccer players run a whopping average of 20 miles a day, or that enjoy a game in which not just a country, but a whole world watches. That's what I like about it. I'm not saying I don't enjoy other, more inherently American sports, because I'm a huge Detroit Tigers fan and I don't think basketballs too shabby either. It's just that if someone says that soccer's not a sport, then they must, to be fair, judge other so-called "sports" by the same measures. Professional biking has made Lance Armstrong one of the most revered sports figures in the world, and I'm pretty sure most of what he does is sit stationary on two wheels. Another example is Tiger Woods. Golf had made him a millionaire several times over, but can anyone really say that what he does involves much, if any, physical exertion? Unless these adversaries of soccer are prepared to condemn half the other sports in America, well, to put it kindly, they can just go suck it.

Going Stir-Crazy

So for three days I've been trying to decide why the hell I'm so damn emotional. And I've finally realized-I'M GOING COMPLETELY STIR-CRAZY!!! I have to, have to, have to get out of this house, becuase seriously, it's possibly the most depressing place on the planet. All my sister does is watch Lifetime movies and all I do is sit in front of a computer all day trying to talk to people who are obviously dealing with their summer much better than I am. GHAAA!!! If I didn't like my hair so much, I would pull it out! So this weekend I'm going up North to Petoskey to see our closest family friends, Bob and Val Walker, and my favorite dog ever, a lovable, hokey Basset Hound who goes by a name just as simple as his big fat paws and his adorable floppy ears, George. Yes, that's right, my Grandparents scheduled our little vacation so that I can go visit a dog before he moves back down to Florida and leaves me forever. How nuerotically stupid is that? *Sigh*... I guess what I'm saying is that the whole being jolly thing isn't really working out for me right now and this is the first time it's ever happened. Maybe some extra slobber and some lovable, brown puppy eyes are all I need to pull me out of this rather rain-cloudy mood. I really hope so, because the fact that I feel like crap, is making the whole situation, well, crappier.

Be Jolly!

So sitting here in Economics, I want to write a little bit about the importance of being jolly. :) -Contrary to popular belief, it's ridiculously important. And what has prompted this post? Well, that may be the fact that I go to a highschool in which it seems that just about every human being minus my chosen social group seems to have some sort of drama. Until you listen into a small town highschool conversation, in class, at a lunch table, or just in passing, you have no idea just how overblown and out of proportion a 14-18 year olds life can get. Case in point-recently, I walked into the bathroom and perused one of the most unbelievingly mind-numbing pity rants in the history of the planet. Written on a toilet paper dispenser. "Why does no one love me? My boyfriend is a dousche. Are there really no great guys out there? Why does it seem like every guy I pick ends up misusing me, cheating on me, and treating me like crap?" etc, etc, etc...bla bla bla bla. Well, I thought to myself while attempting not to recognize the handwriting as that of one of my closest friends, maybe you should stop picking them. Because it seems to me that if they're never in your life, you'll never have a problem with them. Now, I know that sounds like a simple and obvious solution, but to too many highschoolers, it never even occurs to them. They just keep going around and around and around the same outrageously dramatic circle until they've convinced themselves that there's something wrong with them, their lives, or the planet in general. And I say-enough! For God sakes, half the population of earth is suffering in Third World poverty and you're worried about whether you'll ever find the right guy? Or whether your best friend thinks you're fat? Get over yourself! You are not the most important thing in the world. That may sound heartless, but really, you should here some of the things that people my age worry about! You can only nod and smile so much before you begin to feel like maybe you're losing all relevant brain power. I'm not saying that I, alone, am immune to these teenage dramas. Believe me, I get them. But it's rare. It's not something I worry about. In fact, I'm pretty sure that that's why my only sibling hates me. Because I really, really, don't care. About anything. I'm perfectly happy letting the world take it's course and bring me along for the ride. So be jolly, people! Contrary to popular belief, it's not just another word for "slacker", "lazy", or "just plain stupid". It's a legitimate strategy. I will not apologize for living outside of everyone elses brain-sucking stress vortex.

What to do, what to do...

Sitting here in Nutrition Ed and wondering what to write about. So much stuff has been going on lately, (nothing bad), but there' s just so many things in my head and I don't know what to put down! My dear friend Kylie is graduating soon, which is rather depressing, and yet it makes me very, very proud of her. Also, it reminds me that I myself only have one more year in this school before I too am out in the world and on my own. What do I want to do? I have no idea. My ideal job would involve writing and the arts. Anyone who knows me also knows that I love the wierdest things. My favorite TV and movie channel is Turner Classic Movies. My taste in books ranges from reference, to greek, to usually published over seventy-five years ago. My dream trip would be to tour all of the greatest art museums in the world, starting with the Louvre and ending in the Guggenheim. If I could, I'd probably visit as may of the oldest houses in the country as I could, just to look at them. I adore Beauty and the Beast and anyone who says that Gene Kelley wasn't a genius deserves to be dipped in a pool of hot wax. If my sister wants to watch Glee, I prefer to watch Deadliest Catch. My favorite band has often been described as "prog rock" and most of American society would probably mistake them for a trio of gay opera singers. Oh, and did I mention that two out of my three favorite magazines are the Smithsonian and The Week? I have a deep wish to go sift through the Historical Room in Otsego Public Library. Yes, you guessed it. I am a GIANT GEEK, and I have no idea how to mash all of these loves into one, specific career. Ghaa. It's very scary, and very exciting, and I hope that when I do eventually decide, I get it right, because my biggest fear in the world is getting it wrong, and being eternally unhappy.

This Is One Battle I Think I'm Losing

Not a lot of people know this, but I've been in a lot of pain this last month or so. I try to keep it under wraps, go to school, do my homework, and not worry my parents, but the truth of the matter is that my body is falling apart. Only a few months ago I seemed to have it under wraps, but lately, with the extensive playing we've been going through in band and the effects of mental exhaustion, my spine and my Raynaud's seem to be rebelling against me. If I try to write, my hands tense up, swell, and send throbbing pains into every joint. If I sit, my back screams in protest and refuses to find a comfortable position. Even just perching myself at a lunch table is sometimes a chore, and sneaking pain killers at school is an act I hate performing. Besides, my body has grown more and more resistant due to continual use. Sometimes, I'm not even sure why I'm even taking them anymore-Maybe I just like to pretend they make me better. So this is what worries me-if this is how I am at sixteen-years-old, how will I be when I'm twenty? Or forty? I used to love shopping, or taking long walks with friends. Now, I tend to refuse such invitations on the grounds that I'm busy, when the fact of the matter is I just can't manage to walk non-stop for such long periods of time, and even if I could, I'd be severely regretting it later. Is this how I'm going to have to live for the rest of my life? Constant pain? It's gotten so bad that most of the time I can't even drive comfortably anymore. I hate what these conditions are doing to my body. I feel like I'm sixty, not sixteen, and although I try to live my life, it's starting to get harder and harder. So I guess my biggest question is-What if I forget what it feels like to live pain-free? It's looking more and more likely that that's going to be a reality. So I'm scared...what can I say.

Song I Woke Up to This Morning

So every morning, without fail, I wake up to a tune playing in my head. I figured it might be a relief if I shared it. Today's soundtrack was "Sing for Absolution", by Muse.